to Rescue Workers, Californians
(UPN Wire) Staff Writer
LOS ANGELES, CA
California's tripple-headed Governor Arnold
Schwarzenegger addressed the residents, emergency
response workers, and the media today from the small
California coastal town of La Conchita today.
The movie-star-turned-actor-
middle head praised the efforts of rescue workers and
citizens in their quick response to a landslide which
buried half of the town killing at least 10 and leaving
dozens of others missing or homeless.
The middle head of the english-challenged governor
went on to pledge the support of the California
state government as well as its citizens while the left
and right heads looked on solemnly, occasionally
nodding their agreement to points the middle head
was making.
La Conchita (which is Spanish for "small feminine man") has
300 residents and is located on the California coast 2 hours
west of Los Angeles. The town is nestled at the foot of
towering bluffs which look out over the Pacific Ocean. Weeks
of above-average rainfall and high winds have swamped
the area and much of Los Angeles and Southern California
causing mudslides, traffic accidents and power outages
which have so far claimed over 23 lives.
On Monday afternoon the saturated hillside above La
Conchita (which is Spanish for "the conch shell") gave
way sending thousands of tons of mud and debris racing
down the hillside and into the quiet town.
The Governor flew from Sacramento or Hollywood to
personally assess the devastation. "This is a tremendous
tragedy," said the Governor's middle head. "I have never
before in all of my year as the Governor of the State of
California seen this town buried in so much mud. It is a
tremendous tragedy." This statement elicited another nod
from the right head while the left head merely looked down at
the Governor's shoes. That's left and right as you look at the
Governor, not the Governor's left and right.
La Conchita (located just south of Santa Barbara and which
means "roadside comfort station" in Spanish) will spend the
next several weeks and months digging out from beneath the
mud and rubble. But in the mean time the struggle to find the
dead and missing pushes on.
Milt Stimley is a Staff Writer for the UPN News Wire
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